An Imo Pectore
by hangmeuptodry
Summary: Team Seven Drabbles. 05. In which Naruto blowing their vacation money on a trampoline... isn't so bad. Like, at all.
1. Kiss Off

**A/N: **This was sudden and out of the blue. I just love the Team7Dynamic. I hope they get their shit together before they just turn into another shinobi cautionary tale, like_ "The ANBU Who Cried Orochimaru"_. All of these drabbles will be pretty damn short, so yeah.

**Title: **Kiss Off

**Summary: **Sakura doesn't really need reassurance, but Kakashi gives it anyway.

**Characters/Pairings: **Just some good 'ol KakaSaku teacher/student fluff for now. I love that shittt. asdfghjkl.

* * *

It was a beautiful day in Konoha. Sakura had no emergencies at the hospital and decided to treat herself to a nice day off with her teammates. It was really sad how little time she got to spend with them. After Sasuke returned, they were all able to reconnect and rebuild the bonds that he tried so desperately to break.

Ha, sucker.

He didn't _actually_ think he could kill them off that easily, _right?_

Foolish little Sasuke-kun.

It was the perfect day for a light spar between teammates. The wind was blowing and the sun was shining with a pleasant glow, but was restrained from being too bright by the fluffy clouds surrounding it.

Somewhere on a rooftop on the other side of town, Shikamaru Nara was having a field day.

Except not really, because, let's face, the boy was_ lay-zay_.

In not so many words, it was a great day for strengthening the bonds of friendship and love that made Team Seven-

"Come on, Teme! Is that the best you can do?"

Naruto's shadow clones flung themselves at Sasuke from all directions, looking for blood and possibly a lock of his hair to sell to his fangirls, since he needed more Ichiraku money.

-A total trainwreck.

Sakura ignored their fighting in favor of reading the new medical text Tsunade had given her on disrupting chakra flow. Only stopping to occasionally check on their fight, Sakura read her book. That's usually all she did when she came to training anyway. She was the brain of the group. Whether her pinky finger could break boulders or not, her teammates never actually took her seriously.

_"Hn. Aren't medics supposed to conserve their chakra?"_

_"I don't wanna hurt you Sakura-chan!"_

Whatever. It didn't bother her as much as it used to. She was sure of her fighting abilities, but the truth was Sakura knew she was a healer and a damn good one.

She lived to mend. Destroying and fixing at the same time made her uneasy. Breaking bones just went against the grain nowadays.

Sai sat a few feet away from her, sketching out the complex training tactics he saw in front of him. He found the dynamics of Naruto and Sasuke's relationship to be... well... interesting.

_"So are you saying you're not dickless because your penis isn't stuck up Traitor's ass?"_

_"I'M NOT GAY, YOU ASSHOLE. AND IF I WAS I WOULD'NT BE SCREWING THE TEME, THAT'S FOR SURE."_

_"You know what they say about those who doth protest too much..."_

...No matter how dysfunctional they were, Sakura didn't love them any less. Even though they never took her seriously in spars and Naruto liked leaving his ramen bill to her and Sasuke didn't know how to speak properly and his constant critiques on how she folded her laundry and how he always complained about how she shouldn't overwork herself at the hospital, but then he would show up on her door step, bleeding to death after a solo mission and how he always ate all her damn tomatoes and _GOD WOULD IT KILL HIM TO TAKE HER OUT TO ONE DINNER? SHE HAD NEEDS!_

Kakashi sat in the branch directly above her head, his little orange book in hand, watching her rant to herself.

"Sakura."

She looked at her teacher now sitting beside her on the grass, a humorous look in his eye.

"Yes, sensei?"

"I can't understand a single word you're reading."

Kakashi watched as Sakura's face morphed into a cute mixture of surprise and confusion, her button nose scrunching up with a lack of understanding.

"Why were you reading my book, sensei?"

Kakashi could admit that he hadn't been the best sensei to Team Seven. He only taught Naruto a few things after he already had Jiraiya, don't even get him started on Sasuke's—

_Chakra string_ and a little lecture on revenge? Did you _really_ think that would be enough? _Seriously?_

—little escapade to a major pedophile, but he could honestly say his effect on Sakura's current day success was nonexistent.

So whenever he saw those bottle green glasses look up at him with an amount of adoration that unsettled his stomach, he felt guilty.

_Really_ guilty.

"Well I was just interested in what you were doing, Sakura. Like any good sensei would be."

Sakura's face turn into a clearly suspicious one. She was giving him the I Smell Bullshit™ eye.

Kakashi gulped and then quickly continued.

"Maybe you wouldn't mind telling me what you were reading about? The language is so complex that I don't have a snowball's chance in hell at reading it with my poor old eye."

Sakura's eyes lit up and there was a loving smile on her face, displaying the perfect rows of teeth she had.

Dainty fingers came up and pulled down the right side of Kakashi's mask. Warm, supple, Cupid's bow lips placed a grateful kiss on the side of his face.

"I would love to, Kakashi-sensei."

As she began to tell him some very useful information about starting his chakra flow back up after it has been disrupting by enemy nin, Kakashi's ears stopped working.

For the first time in Kami knows how long, Kakashi blushed from a source other than Icha Icha.

Naruto and Sasuke were not pleased.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

_"CHIDORI!"_

_"RASENGAN!"_

_"...Could you possibly attack Kakashi-san on that side of the field? I don't have a good angle from here."_

* * *

Well that's drabble one. Tell me what you think?

xx mm.


	2. It Takes Two

**A/N: **I have no idea where this came from.

**Title: **It Takes Two

**Summary: **Sasuke didn't know what to think when Sakura left Kakashi's apartment all sweaty. Well... He did know. He just hoped he was wrong.

**Characters/Pairings: **SasuSaku, some speculated KakaSaku lovin'

* * *

It was the fifth time this week Sasuke caught Sakura looking both ways before she completely stepped out of the apartment complex where Kakashi resided on the third floor, where he could be watched from a tree that gave a great view of the two windows on the west side of the concrete structure.

How did the last remaining Uchiha know this exactly?

Because it was the _fourth _time this week that he had sat on said tree, waiting for Kakashi to draw his suspiciously closed curtains.

Seriously.

Who kept their curtains closed in the middle of September?

There was so much to look at.

_Oh yeah? Like what? Dead foliage? _

Sasuke's scowl grew deeper as he watched Sakura hurry down the road she came from, as if she had somewhere to be.

He would get down to the bottom of this.

There was something about Sakura leaving Kakashi's apartment all sweaty and disheveled that didn't sit right in his stomach.

Or a little higher up in his anatomy.

Let's just say his esophagus hurt.

_Yeah. _

Sensei/student relationships were just hard to swallow, that's all.

* * *

Kakashi chuckled deeply as he felt his brooding student's chakra leaving the perimeter of his apartment building. Leaving the confines of his hot bathroom, Kakashi felt cleansed from all the sweating he had done with Sakura. Turning off the sensual romance song playing on his stereo.

Picking up the empty sake glasses, he made his way to the kitchen, where he fully intended to finish off the strawberries his pink haired partner had left on his counter in her hurry to get to the hospital.

Eyeing the skirt hanging off the back of his couch, Kakashi chuckled once more.

One student was stalking him in a jealous rage and the other was leaving her things all over his apartment.

What was next? Blonde hair in his shower drain?

* * *

Days passed and Sasuke was growing restless. Kakashi and Sakura had left together after training.

While Naruto had seen nothing wrong with that, he refused to be fooled by their nonchalance towards the situation at hand. All he could picture was Kakashi holding Sakura in the way lovers did in the after glow of the most passionate love making.

He was NOT okay with this, dammit!

Sasuke followed the two shinobi from a distance, watching their amicable chatter with growing irritation until they made their way into Kakashi's apartment. Climbing up his beloved tree, Sasuke scrambled to conceal himself with the surrounding leaves as he saw Sakura's dainty shadow grow closer to the window closest to him, drawing back the curtains and sliding the glass upward until she could no more.

Sasuke could feel satisfaction oozing through his pores as he arranged himself in order to see perfectly whatever was going on inside. He watched as the two spoke in leveled voices, completely comfortable with each other. Then his eyes grew wide as they shared a plate of peach slices. Sakura bit into hers without hesitance, causing the juice to dribble down her chin a bit. She licked it away happily and, paired with her slight messy appearance from training, looked positively erotic.

His blood began to boil as Kakashi pulled down his mask, sharing a glass of sake with his student, revealing his face to her as if it wasn't something he and Naruto had tackled him numerous times during their spars to see.

It was disturbing how close they seemed, but he couldn't look away.

Sakura stood up and shed her shirt, revealing a black band-like strap covering her supple chest, and skirt, leaving only the spandex shorts she kept on underneath.

Her boots were toed off at the doorway, revealing toned legs that he admired only in secret.

Kakashi, who had long ago swapped his standard jounin shirt for a black wifebeater, moved his way towards his stereo, putting on a song that he didn't understand, but sounded vaguely sexual.

When they pushed the furniture out of the way and moved towards each other's bodies, he could feel some kind of lava coursing through his veins.

Sure of her movements, Sakura ran her gentle fingers up and down Kakashi's arms, until they circled his waist and slid up to his chest. She said something his ear. He responded, but Sasuke was too angry loos tenten closely enough or read their lips.

So he flung himself through the window and landed expertly in Kakashi's living room.

Kakashi didn't seem too surprised to see him.

"Hello, Sasuke. Finally decided to show yourself?"

"Sasuke-kun, what are you doing here?"

Too angry to stay in character, Sasuke yanked Sakura by the wrist, ignoring how smooth the skin of her arm was, and pulled her to stand behind him.

"I'm here to protect you, Sakura! I can't just let this horny old perverted, bastard—"

"Give me dance lessons?"

"...what?"

Sakura smiled coyly at him as he stuttered his protest.

He was a shame to all the Uchihas rolling over in their graves.

"But then why were you...sake...no clothes...no mask...touching?"

"Sasuke, I'm going on a seduction mission next month and Kakashi-sensei has been teaching me the tango. The guy is a pervert, but a dance connoisseur so I have to learn the dances and seduce him. Sensei offered to teach me since I didn't know how."

"Why were you drinking sake with him?"

Sakura's eyes went to the floor and she blushed a lovely scarlet.

"Tsunade-shishou recommended I loosen up a little so I wouldn't be so embarassed. It's not like we were on a binge or anything..."

Sasuke wanted to bash his head into a wall, but he already used up his idiot points when he started stuttering, so he settled for a disinterested "Hn".

"Take me home, Sasuke-kun?"

He gave the slightest of nods before moving towards the doorway where Kakashi was standing.

Sakura slipped on her shirt and shoes, then bid him a goodbye until tomorrow. Sasuke followed after her, glaring at Kakashi until they turned right to go down the stairs.

Kakashi just laughed at his student's jealousy.

"Enjoy her newfound skills, Sasuke."

* * *

**A/N: **I love making Sasuke suffer.

read my other stories!

xx mm.


	3. Team Seven Formation

**A/N: **I literally just pulled this out of my ass.

**Title: **Team Seven Formation

**Summary: **Sakura just knows she's going to become a cat lady. Sasuke and Kakashi prove her wrong. Naruto contemplates the nature of a player.

**Characters/Pairings: **KakaSaku speculation, Failed NaruSaku, Ultimately SasuSaku

* * *

Naruto observed his favorite female in the entire world from across the counter they were sitting at in Ichiraku. Over the years, the simple ramen stand had gathered the funds to expand because of a steady stream of hungry customers—

"Dobe, you're alwys dragging us to eat this crap."

"I don't see you complaining, Sir Asshole!"

"Didn't you just hear our little Sasuke chan? That _was_ him complaining."

—but no matter how many booths and tables they had, Team Seven always took their places, because they were _their_ chairs _dammit_, at the bar in front.

The formation was simple. They skipped a chair, Kakashi-sensei sat down, then came Sasuke. They made the Apathetic Club™. Next came Sakura, who loved sitting between her boys, and then Naruto.

But today, Sakura had chosen to take the seat at the far end, basically putting herself in a corner, and gloomily ordered a pork ramen and dumplings, when she always ordered a vegetable ramen.

Naruto, being the slightly dense character he is, thought nothing of it, thinking she probably just wanted more space down the bar for all the food she just ordered and _holy shit did she just finish all that food what the fu_—

"You okay, Sakura-chan?"

Sasuke, who had sat next to Sakura, which caused him to sit next to Kakashi, stopped eating and looked at the girl beside him.

Kakashi didn't move at all, that bastard...

"I'm fine, Naruto. Just getting ready for my future."

"Huh? What do you mean? And why are you eating so much? Geez, Sakura-chan, at this rate you'll get f—oof!"

Sasuke had elbowed him in the gut. _Oh fuck,_ it was agonizing.

How had he not thrown up yet?

"Fucking Baka, have some tact."

Sasuke muttered this to him through gritted teeth and a closed mouth.

How the hell did he _do _that?

"That was the plan, Naruto."

At this, everyone stopped. Kakashi stopped eating behind the cover of his book, Naruto stopped groaning in pain and Sasuke stopped his eternal brooding.

What in the hell was she talking about?

"Yeah, Naruto. I'm gonna end up fat, old, and alone. I'll adopt a few cats tomorrow and then get ahead on my to-do list."

Leave it to Sakura to be an overachiever at becoming a cat lady.

"Sakura," Kakashi spoke in his drawl with a hint of concern and anxiety, "What exactly brought about these changes to your diet and attitude?"

Kakashi hated change. That was the really reason none of them had changed in their attitudes or wardrobe or eating habits much over the years.

Naruto came to training in a black t-shirt once, while Sasuke wore a gray one, and Sakura wore a blue one.

Kakashi had a fit and then passed out. Sakura said he died for 5 seconds.

"I never get asked out because half the guys in this village are scared of you, another 40% are scared of Tsunade, and the last remaining 10% can't decide who to be scared of more. I'm gonna end up alone. So I've decided to follow regular custom and become a cat lady."

Immediately, the three boys were consumed with guilt, and a bit of pride, that they could keep so many people away from Sakura, who looked as miserable as they came."

"Wait..."

Naruto thought to the rumors going around Konoha that Sasuke and Sakura were secretly dating. Sure, he started them, but they were kind of supposed to end up together. That was always the plan...

"I thought you and the Teme were together."

At this, Sasuke's spine stiffened and Kakashi's eyes widened.

"No, we're not. We haven't even gone on a date."

Sasuke's fingers tightened a bit more on his chopsticks and Kakashi chuckled in badly restrained anxiety.

_Everyone's changing. Breathe Kakashi, breathe._

"Eh? Why not?"

Naruto's face twisted into one of severe confusion. What was going on here?

"I don't know. You guys didn't automatically think we'd end up together did you?"

Kakashi and Naruto looked at each other in a shared thought as they contemplated the dynamics of their legendary team.

_Well, yeah. We actually did, Sakura._

Sasuke, on the other hand, was growing more and more frustrated as the moments passed. His brooding had resumed, this time at a more aggravated pace as he berated himself and his team mentally. They were talking about him like he wasn't even there! He stole at glance to his right, where Sakura sat, sipping on the last of her broth.

"By default, dear Sakura, that would mean you're going to end up with either myself or Sasuke-chan."

Sakura put her bowl down.

Sasuke's chopsticks broke.

Naruto felt excluded.

"WHAT? HOW COME I DON'T HAVE A CHANCE!?"

"Naruto, ever since the war ended, the NaruHina has officially set sail. You even took her out for ramen last week. Remember?"

Naruto slumped in his seat, obviously dejected.

_The girl slapped me in the face and that makes us canon? Okay, fine, we held hands, but Ero-Sennin always told me to never get tied down too early!_

Kakashi continued, "And you're much too mature to get tied down with a kid like Naruto, Sakura. You need a man. I think I fit that bill."

Sakura's face turned a shocked vermillion.

"Kakashi..."

"Don't act so shocked, Sakura. You've always felt that scorching sexual tension with a side of dominance on my part between us, haven't you?"

Sakura turned pensive as she placed a dainty finger on her chin.

"Hmm, you do have a point. That has been there recently..."

"And you can't expect a hormonally stunted kid like Sasuke to please you, can you?"

Naruto could not believe they were actually having this conversation.

"You might be on to something there..."

Sasuke choked on his own spit and began to protest.

"What the fu-"

"Think about it, Sakura."

Naruto looked at the murderous glaring Kakashi and Sasuke were partaking in.

_On second thought, greed is a mortal sin..._

"Maybe I will! Well, I'm off. I have a shift at the hospital. Ja!

Sakura pranced from Ichiraku, too busy thinking about Kakashi to remember her ability to get a date.

Sasuke took a look back at Kakashi, who was looking at Sakura's ass as she walked away.

Sasuke hurriedly got and followed after her, picking her up by the waist and flinging her over his shoulder, dragging her in the direction of the Uchiha Compound on the other side of the village.

"Sasuke-kun! Put me down!"

Passing his former sensei again, he mumbled a viscious, "I'll show you hormonally stunted when she's too sore for work tomorrow," and continued on his way.

Naruto, gaping in shock, turned back to Kakashi, whose mischievous eye crinkling gave away his plans.

"Uh, sensei. Would you ever _actually_ try to get with Sakura-chan?"

Kakashi turned back to his book.

"Well, our Sakura-chan has grown to be quite the lovely flower over the years, but I wouldn't allow myself to be tied down."

"EH!?"

* * *

Read and review!

xx mm.


	4. Dissociative Personality Disorder

**A/N: **I actually really like the way this came out. Can anyone see the "How I Met Your Mother" references?

**Title:** Dissociative Personality Disorder

**Summary: **The entirety of the team is downright wasted. Well, except for Kakashi. Not yet, at least.

**Pairings: **Pick out the love as you deem it appropriate.

* * *

"Never have I ever..."

Insert evil grin.

"...Combed my hair."

A unanimous groan resounded across the group, save for the very smug blonde, as they each took a swig of sake.

"Wait. You mean you actually comb your hair to look like a rooster's ass?"

"...Shut up dobe."

_Hours later._

"H-hey guys! It's gettin' *hic* late. We should all go b'ck to m'place and—"

"Sakura, the last time we went to your place after leaving this bar, drunker than skunks, we woke up as naked as Buddha on the day of his birth, with a suspicious looking pineapple on your bedside table."

It was the same thing every time they went out to a bar. They started with some drinking game, Naruto's idiotic contributions got them drunk, and then they would wake up the next morning in a completely different place than the bar they went to.

Naked.

They _always_ woke up naked.

There was even an instance where they were roused awake by the Hyuuga guard geese at 7:43 AM in the estate's main garden, where they laid there naked among the flowers.

Petals and leaves were the only things covering them that day.

Kakashi had decided to quit the drinking while he was ahead that night.

He never expected to see how much his formidable, totally badass, infamous Team Seven be reduced to...

Well, _idiots_.

"Buh yer not *hic* drunk!"

"Because I don't want to end up like Sasuke did that morning."

"He was okeey-dokeey!"

"He had a butterfly tattoo above his asscrack."

Somewhere in the bar, Naruto's laughter, slightly maniacal, left him loudly at the reminder of Sasuke's tramp stamp.

Sasuke was too busy dancing seductively in front of the wall-length mirror in the bar, fruity, sake laden drink in hand, blowing kisses to his reflection, to remember how painful to his body and pride it had been for Sakura to remove the tattoo.

Once Sasuke got enough drinks in his system, he suddenly became aware of how beautiful he is.

Not handsome.

_Beautiful. _

"Sh'o, come 'ere offen?"

Kakashi's hair actually shifted to the side by the force of the sweatdrop that came over him.

He was no better than any of them, of course, even if he had retained a somewhat sober countenance tonight.

Sakura once told him that once he got drunk enough, he started a solemn account of his time as a youth in the Shinobi Wars. The narration always started with:

"It was night and Kumo-ninja were everywhere. I had killed three children that day, one of them my dearest partner Ryuuji, who had to die because his crying for his mother was about to ruin our cover! I poisoned his fish ration that morning, pondering the monstrous being I had become all the while..."

Shaking off uneasy memories, Kakashi scanned the room to look for his female teammate who had wandered off.

Instead, he found Naruto.

He stood in the middle of the bar, donning a black baggy hoodie he probably scared off a youth passing by outside. Microphone in hand, he was spitting and blowing in weird combinations as he bobbed to a beat only he could hear. The slightly sober patrons around him stared on, torn between laughing and utter confusion.

_Oh Kami._

He was _beat boxing._

_And failing. _

_Again._

Naruto had this thing where, once inebriated, he would take on a westernized persona whose backstory consisted of a troubled youth that grew up in the rough projects of some underdeveloped slum, using rapping and hustling as an outlet for the troubling reality that he was "never leavin' tha ghetto".

As he was torn between getting up and stopping him and just watching, a pair of breasts crushed into his back.

"Oh Kaka-kun!" Insert shameless giggle "I've been looking fer you er'where! You and I should—"

Sakura's speech reduced itself to a whisper as her sake soaked speech mentioned too many unmentionable things.

Kakashi flushed a bright pink.

He wasn't used to hearing that stuff _sober_.

"Sakura, you're drunk."

"Buh 'm willing!"

"No."

"'N 22, to'lly legal!"

"No."

"MY BODY 'SHREADY!"

His eye twitched as she made her way to the bar, shirt already in the process of being discarded.

"Sakura! Stop that!"

His pink haired teammate was always trying to have her way with him, or Sasuke, or Naruto, or all of them together or really _anyone_ whenever she got a few drinks in her.

No matter how drunk they were, they still guarded her chastity with their lives.

"WHAT'R YOU LOOKIN' AT?"

Naruto was yelling at Sasuke's reflection.

Which had apparently "looked at him the wrong way".

And Sakura's shirt fell on his head.

Kakashi took a seat at the bar with a sigh of resignation.

From the view of the bartender between Sakura's stretched legs, Kakashi signaled him over.

"5 bottles of sake, please."

"YOU WANNA GO? LET'S GO!"

"Make that six."

* * *

Hope you enjoyed that one.

This is what happens when you watch HIMYM all day on Netflix.

xx mm.


	5. Rooftop Party

**A/N: **I don't know. Leave me alone.

**Title:** Rooftop Party

**Summary: **In which Naruto blowing their vacation money on a trampoline... isn't so bad. Like, at all.

**Note:** Perverted!Sasuke

* * *

Naruto and Sasuke came stumbling back into Konoha, not only did Sakura come running into their arms, regardless of how sweaty and bloody they were...

She smacked them both on top of the head and proposed they all take a shower and then a nap.

That night, they did just that.

Together.

The next morning they started the arrangements to get an apartment big enough for all three of them.

(Kakashi thought it was too much of a hassle to move all his things, but he came over, late of course, for every meal.)

They got a nice apartment that was big enough for all three of them, as well as all the tons of crap they had.

Naruto's "Naruchan™ Limited Edition!" lid stickers.

Sakura's "inhumanly huge" (Naruto said this and Sasuke nodded mutely in agreement) medical texts that were littered with messy, illegible notes.

Sasuke's cases upon cases of weapons and whetstones that "HE DOESN'T EVEN USE!" (Sakura said this in disbelief at the number of old weapons he had brought in) as well as the over-used, abused looking Uchiha texts he would skim when he was younger.

Sasuke was a _total_ hoarder.

You just couldn't tell with all the space in the Uchiha Manor that was currently being renovated.

Anyway, they lived on the top level of their 4 floor apartment building, meaning the best access to the roof, where they would spend days and nights relaxing and enjoying—

"Naruto, put down the hose! NOW!"

"Look, I'm a water bender!"

"...Dobe." Insert shamed head shake.

—each other's company.

Many special events took place on this roof, like the first time Sasuke got electrocuted—

"...!"

"Did he just get electrocuted?"

"HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE!?"

"We will never speak of this. Or else I'll shove a Chidori up your asses."

"...After you just got electrocuted? Bitch, _please_."

—the first time Sakura hit Naruto AND Sasuke on the head—

"DAMMIT SASUKE!"

A comically tall welt sprouted from Sasuke's cage of hair.

"HAHAHAHA, I never knew it was so funny from this en—OW SAKURA-CHAN!"

"...Heh, Loser."

—And the time Naruto and Sasuke caught Sakura sneaking licorice straws after they banned it from the home because Sakura was eating too many—

"Li...co...rishh...it's all...MINE!"

"Um,...Sakura-chan?"

"THIS ISN'T WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!"

"Sakura... what the fuck?"

—You get the picture.

All these times, however, were nothing compared to this crucial moment.

"You spent our vacation money on a..."

Insert violent twitch 'n' spasm combo.

"...Trampoline."

"B-But, Sakura-chan! We NEEDED this."

"Give me one good reason why we need a ridiculously expensive trampoline instead of an island vacation."

"Uh..."

"Dobe. Just... don't."

Kakashi observed his three former students, arranged in a lopsided triangle as Naruto began to slowly back away from his female teammate.

Even _Sasuke_ looked a little sympathetic.

"Why don't you look angry?"

Sasuke's eyes shifted to look at him while somehow still keeping an eye on the chaos that was sure to erupt any second now.

"Hn... Sakura in a red bikini."

"...And what seems to be the problem?"

"Add a bunch of other perverted losers—"

"Ah, I see."

"—And _you_, and you'll see my problem."

"Why Sasuke, you wound me."

"Sexual predator."

_Ouch._

* * *

Contrary to popular belief, that trampoline did not cause Naruto's life to come to an end.

Instead, it became a crucial part of "roof party time".

It all started when Sakura and Sasuke were sitting in the living room reading medical and Uchiha jutsu scrolls, respectively.

The_ squeak_ sound that hit they're ninja sensitive ears without relent left Sasuke's eyebrow to twitch dangerously.

"I'll take care of it."

Sakura made her way up to the ceiling, leaving Sasuke with the belief that silence was soon to come.

Then the noise got louder.

_Squeak!_

Twitch.

_Squeak!_

Twitch.

_Squeak!_

Twitch.

_SQUEAK!_

Twitchtwitchtwitchtwich—

That was it!

However, all his anger dissipated at the scene he was greeted with upon opening the roof entrance.

Soon enough, he was sitting next to Kakashi, who had seemingly been there the whole time reading his book, watching the—ehem—captivating sights.

At first sight, you just see two teammates jumping on a trampoline.

Take a second look, and you see Sakura.

One word.

_Ass._

Add an adjective.

_Toned._

When Naruto and her linked arms and rotated, the flimsy oversized shirt she had once stolen from Sasuke rode up to under her breasts, exposing a smooth expanse of stomach , and the telltale underwire of a black bra.

Did Sasuke ever say how much he loved living with Sakura, who, with her booty shorts and stolen shirts, was something to look at as she bent over to get a bag of baby carrots at the bottom of the fridge?

"What was that about perverted losers, Sasuke-chan?"

"I'm not a loser."

"You never denied being a pervert."

"...Hn."

He didn't blame Sasuke.

After all, he hadn't turned a page in like _10 minutes_.

Who needed an island vacation again?

* * *

Don't judge me.

xx mm.


End file.
